Trekkie Temperament Sorter

With the new Star Trek XI movie hitting the theaters, more people are putting aside their regular mundane issues of life and death, and asking themselves the really tough questions:

Am I a Star Trek fan?  Or am I a Trekkie? 

Here's a quick sorter to give you a rough idea!

1. What's better: BoBW or TATV?
2. Who do you go drinking with - B4 or Lore? Who waters your plants when you're on vacation?
3. You fall in love with a Vulcan. Where & when do you spend your first "honeymoon"?
4. Where in the Star Trek universe can you find the elusive "Freakasaurus"?
5. You're having a baby. Either Noonian or Arik will be driving you to the hospital. Who do you choose?
6. You're married. Who nags you about your socks on the floor?
7. Your next accountant: Quark or Rom?
8. What ship makes Picard nostalgic?
9. Corbomite or Carbonite?
10. You're at Sisko's for dinner with Nog and Counselor Troi. Do you eat the the gumbo or have what Troi is having for dessert?
11. Archer & T'Pol discovered a nebula. What did they name it?
12. Why was Archer so sympathetic with Trip after the promotion of the Cogenitor?
13. Why can there be no justice?
14. The Borg have found your shield frequency. Orders, Captain?
15. What has no bloody A,B,C, or D, and where is it?
16. Who seeks "Peaceful Coexistence"? 
    
17. A galactic lifeform has imprinted on your ship and is sucking the energy dry.  Simplified metaphor, Captain?
18. Why did Beverly know she was caught in a warp bubble?
19. Was DaVinci a fat guy or a thin guy?
    
20. Prax:  Moon, Ship, or Forehead?

ANSWERS BELOW:































ANSWERS:

1. What's better: BoBW or TATV?   [BoBW - Best of Both Worlds]
   
2. Who do you go drinking with - B4 or Lore? Who waters your plants when you're on vacation? [Lore, B4]
   
3. You fall in love with a Vulcan. Where & when do you spend your first "honeymoon"?  [You "Pon Farr" on Vulcan - which could be anything up to seven years from now]
   
4. Where in the Star Trek universe can you find the elusive "Freakasaurus"?  [Earth, Los Angeles, 1996, what Rain Robinson called Tuvok]
   
5. You're having a baby. Either Noonian or Arik will be driving you to the hospital. Who do you choose? [Arik if you want to get there in time, Noonien if you want your baby to have an evil twin]
   
6. You're married. Who nags you about your socks on the floor?  [Why that's Keiko O'Brien, of course]
   
7. Your next accountant: Quark or Rom?  [Quark if you want to keep your shirt!]
   
8. What ship makes Picard nostalgic? [the Stargazer]
   
9. Corbomite or Carbonite? [Corbomite]
   
10. You're at Sisko's for dinner with Nog and Counselor Troi. Do you eat the the gumbo or have what Troi is having for dessert?  [Try the dessert, it's chocolate!  Unless you like mealworm gumbo?]
    
11. Archer & T'Pol discovered a nebula. What did they name it?  [the Robinson Nebula, after Archer's fellow astronaut]
    
12. Why was Archer so sympathetic with Trip after the promotion of the Cogenitor? [Trick question!  The Cogenitor died, and Archer was livid with Trip]
    
13. Why can there be no justice?  [So long as laws are absolute!  Judge Aaron Satie as quoted by Picard]
    
14. The Borg have found your shield frequency. Orders, Captain?  [Um, I think you'd better rotate the frequency PDQ!]
    
15. What has no bloody A,B,C, or D, and where is it?  [A holo-representation of the Enterprise Bridge as programmed by Captain Scott, on the holodeck of the Picard's Enterprise D]
    
16. Who seeks "Peaceful Coexistence"?  [Commander Remmick, taken over by parasitic aliens in TNG's Conspiracy]
    
17. A galactic lifeform has imprinted on your ship and is sucking the energy dry.  Simplified metaphor, Captain? [Sour the milk!  Sour the milk!]
    
18. Why did Beverly know she was caught in a warp bubble?  [Because if there was nothing wrong with her, there must be something wrong with the universe!]
    
19. Was DaVinci a fat guy or a thin guy?  [THIN!  DaVinci was a THIN guy, when Captain Kirk and Mr Spock met him.  Captain Janeway's holoprogram of DaVinci was a FAT GUY]
    
20. Prax:  Moon, Ship, or Forehead?  [Forehead!  This was Devore Commander Kashyk's second in command when they boarded Voyager for inspection in "Counterpoint"].
    

Calculating Your Trek Mojo:

< 0
You are what is known as a "moviegoer".  But there is hope for you!  Take this test again in a few weeks.  If your score has improved, you are metamorphosing into a Trekkie!

<10 
You are a Star Trek fan.  Chin up!  Even Zephram Cochrane had to start with a dream (and a nuclear warhead).  You have an application to Starfleet Academy.  Do you mail it in?  The choice is yours.  The choice is yours.

11-16 Correct: 
You are a Trekkie!  Congratulations would be given, but none are required.  You are already too cool for internet social affirmation.  So crack open a bottle of Aldeberran whisky and a plate of Racht, pop in your favorite Trek DVD and live the life of the righteous!

17-20 Correct:
Are you wearing your uniform right now?  Go and put it on, you know you want to!   You are a Trekker though you may self-deprecatingly refer to yourself as a Trekkie.  You know everything from the first words of the Horta to what day the new torpedoes are arriving to what Phlox secretly feeds Porthos.  Book yourself a Vulcan neuropressure session - you deserve it!

20^n Correct:  You are the Cytherian Barclay of Star Trek Knowledge and this test fills you with righteous superior scorn!  You warrant a continuum or wormhole in which to dwell in your hyperadvanced Trekdom!


Remember kids, knowing is half the battle.  Q'Pla!